“Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.”

― Ambrose Bierce

There are times when I think if I was deaf, dumb and blind, I’d be a happier person and someone easier to live with. There are times when I see or read or hear something that so angers me that my mouth gets me in trouble. As an example:

I read in the paper about this “Christian” pastor in a Sacramento (CA) area church who said, from his pulpit during his sermon, that he wished the nightclub shooter in Orlando had killed more people in the gay club, that God has put a death sentence on gays and that, “I wish the government would round them all up, put them up against a firing wall, put a firing squad in front of them, and blow their brains out.” (The sermon has been posted on YouTube.) 

Well, my instinctive reaction was to open my mouth and say that I think that much the same and (censored, more) should be done to him and his ilk. I was immediately called on my comments by my saintly wife who pointed out, “Don’t you realize, by what you just said, that you’ve put yourself down to his level?” I admitted it and shut my mouth knowing that I had played right into that little man’s anger with my own (and once again pained the person I cherish the most, and who all too often is the innocent audience to my rants).

Both he and I felt righteous anger and both he and I were wrong.

I know that what both of us said probably wasn’t one of our “best” speeches, yet I know mine is one I regret.

It seems my mouth often is the source of my biggest regrets.

And I regret that. Which led me to thinking about another quote:

“We doubt in others, what is in fact in ourselves. The skeletons in your own closet are the things that scare you the most about others; people who come from a background of lying are suspicious of lying in others and so on and so forth…We see the world through the eyes of the condition of our own souls.” 

― C. JoyBell C.

This quote is a longer but a more explanatory expansion of another I heard a long time ago, “What a person loudly condemns they are secretly guilty of themselves.”

Thinking about what I’ve written above, why did I express anger towards that preacher’s anger?

Was he loudly condemning gays because he secretly harbors gay feelings that he dispises in himself and thus drew attention away from himself by attacking them, hypocritically, in the name of righteous anger?

The logic contained in the quote would say yes, but only he could know if it’s true.

Was I loudly condemning him because I secretly harbor some homophobic feelings that I despise in myself and thus drew attention away from myself by attacking his (possibly), hypocritically, the name of righteous anger?

The logic contained in the quote would say yes, but I know that’s not true.

Logic could also say that I was condemning his irrational anger because I can be irrationally angry myself at times and I attacked his, hypocritically, in the name of righteous anger.

Just shows about jumping to a conclusion about others, there are often alternate possibilities behind what they say.

Maybe the preacher isn’t secretly latent homosexual.

Maybe he’s just a jerk, unworthy of all the attention he’s getting.

Even here.

– Bill



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